Really Upset Most of the Time

2004-04-21T20:05:00.000-07:00

I hate this blog poo! Anytime I try to post, it wont post the current date, so I have to wait a day. When I write something new it will post it when I have another thing to post. So this might confise you... heres how it works:

Lets say I posted something on April 3, and waited until April 6 to post again. Readers would not be able to see my April 3 entry until April 6. And then they would not be able to see my April 6 until the next post. It is REALLY ANNOYINGA AND I DON'T KNOW WHY IT WORKS LIKE THAT! BLAH!

2004-04-19T19:47:00.000-07:00

Hello all.

Saturday and Sunday were the best. I spent all day with Josh on Saturday, we watched movies at his house and then played Super Mario at mine until 1:00 in the morning! It was SO much fun. Then on Sunday, Tiff, Nikki, Zach, Josh, Noel (friend of Josh), an I went to Josh's house and played on 2 original Nintendos. It was a blast, since we were being really stupid and sucking it up. Then everyone left and Josh and I played some more on the Super!

It is so neat that Josh and I got to spend some quality time together because lately our relationship had been on the rocks and I really thought we were going to break up. But now that we reconnected, things are so much better than they have ever been before. I miss him all the time now. Anyway, thought I would give yall a peek into my thoughts as of now!

Love Yall!!
Megan

2004-03-09T19:38:00.000-08:00

Hi all

TODAY WAS FABULOUS! It was an "easy" day for me, I got to eat lunch with Josh, I was in a fantastic mood, I got like 4-5 hours of sleep, and I've only had 2 cokes today! SO SO SO SO SO SO happy.

I think I am going to go into detail about the workings of the day (for once but only because I had such a wonderful day and want to share, not because it will be a habit).

The day started out with me dragoon butt, and almost being late to class. But first period was really easy, and fun too. We read a translation (Spanish 2) about going to a hospital and I worked with Jose! He is one of the funniest guys at our school!

I got to see Tiffany in the hall before 2nd period which I always love.

2nd period is one of my favorite classes. Mr. O' Donnell is soooo crazy! ^_^ Ruth and I always harass him! On Thursday we are having a physical features test over Africa. I'm excited since it's gonna be an easy 100.

3rd period (another fav.) is B.C.I.S. 1 with Mrs.Newman. It was so weird because she is usually very happy and outgoing, but today she was on the verge of tears the whole class. Josh is in my B.C.I.S. class also, so we always talk about how enthusiastic she is about computers, it was quite a shock. Then Ashley (who had been doing something pertaining to a driver's license) came in with bloodshot eyes and everything. We all agreed that the world was coming to an end.

4th period was band. Mr. Wells was being such a biotch! Pointing out people who had not sold any cookie dough and making a huge deal out of any screw ups. It really bugs me that he teaches with embarrassment.

We went to Vrookshires for lunch and I picked up some sausages. But the best part was when we rolled up into the pit and sat for a while (talking of course!). Some peoples parked beside us and we being sooo mosey and gawking at us, so we decided to give em a show! lol. We started making out. I think it was great because apparently they were questioning some of my buddies in the next class! LOL!

5th period was Geometry with Ms. Carter but she was absent. So we had Mrs. Bean (sooo annoying!). I did nothing for am hour and 15 min.

6th period was Intrumental ensemble. Yay! We all sat around and talked the whole time! ^_^ I LOOVE having class with Josh!

and the last class of the day was athletics. I am really siked! Since the beginning of the year I have almost progressed to lifting my max! ^_^. I am so excited about themile relay! I feel like it connects me in a special way to my teammates! Tiff, Stevie and Haylee I love you!!

After school Josh and I went to Zach's and watched the last part of American History X. I am soo happy with Josh! Yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes yes!!!

Anyway, that sums my day up pretty shortly. I am really happy. Really really happy. Oh and after school we stopped by Josh's so he could check in with his momma and it was really awkward! lol. Anyway, I had a great day. I hope you enjoyed that venture into the life of Megan!

Love you all
PyRo!

2004-03-08T23:31:00.000-08:00

SOOOOOO HAPPY!

Things havetaken a complete turn and all is good and right. Except with Ruth, for she is alone and Ican feel her heart breaking when she sees me with Josh. Yet I am so happy to be in a somewhat relationship, falling for someone... Being able to kiss again.

In my three years of being alone I havelearned that kissing is very important, and I think I will NEVER take that for granted again.

In three short weeks the Megan everyone knew (dark, depressed, anti-love) has disappeared and a new happy magna has emerged.

Can you believe it? I still can't.

I am fat and need to lose weight. That sucks, I wish I could just be skinny and not have to worry about it (*cough cough* Tiffany). Oh well. That bes the way things are.

Falling for Josh
magna

It feels like things are moving, shifting. Something is going to happen soon, I can feel it in the air. Like a coming storm, could be a torrent or a light shower. (I love rain)

Forever yours and always here if you need me or want me.

2004-03-01T20:46:00.000-08:00

Hi to all yet again

I am so amazingly happy, never before have I felt so wonderful. I feel loved, wanted, beautiful... It is too good to be true. Josh is sooo perfect for me and I am so shocked. I think I have totally fallen for him. He is just so sweet! Like he earnestly cares about my happiness and anything about me. That has never happened for me..

My friends mean the world to me. This past weekend I was unable to spend anytime with them and I nearly lost my mind. I rely so heavily on their existence and love it scares m to think of what I would do if they were gone.

There is a track meet on Friday and I am hoping neither Tiffany nor I will be on the mile relay, so we can leave early. Tiffany and Nikki are spending the night on Friday and we are going to make a movie! Based on "The Ring" and it is going to be WONDERFUL! Anyway, on Saturday momma and dad are going to Dallas, so that means it will just be Tiffany, Nikki, Sean, and I. Tiff and Nik's mom wants to go see "The Passion" (blah!) and Sean wants to see it so he can be informed for any debates that spring up in school. So I will be me for about 3 hours. Lol. I have a little but of a plan going for that window of time.. but I will not divulge anything! Not until everything is in place!

Anyway, I'm happy and excited. Even my father's tyranny cannot contain my jubilee!

Love you all
Megan (I <3 Joshua!)

2004-02-29T07:39:00.001-08:00

Good Morning!

I don't know what my problem is, but every time the weekend comes arounf and no one spends the night I wake up really early. Kinda scary cause I'm not a morning person...

Yesterday was really really depressing. I was completely alone and all I did (remember that this was a Saturday) was homework, a little excersize, and weird conversations on the phone.
By 10:00 I had nothing else to do so I just went to bed. Then my phoine rang at 12:15ish!!! It was Josh! ^_^ I was SO happy to talk to him!!!
After he called I couldn't go back to sleep and it really annoyed me.

But like 5 minutes ago I checked my weight, and I am down another pound!!!!!!!!! Thank goodness since I have been at a certain weight forever!

I am really happy! YAY! But I am also cramping really bad, I need some meds.

Love you all SOOOOOOOOOOOOO much!
PyRo*

2004-02-29T07:39:00.000-08:00

2004-02-28T11:34:00.000-08:00

Hello to everyone.

Not much to say. I wish I knew why I am so impatient and insecure. Have a good day.

megan

2004-02-28T09:31:00.000-08:00

Hi to everyone

Not much to say. I wish I could understand why I am so impatient and insecure. Have a good day.

megan

2004-02-25T20:59:00.000-08:00

Hi to all

Today was alright. I took another test today except it was math... math we have never actually um.. learned. lol. No worries though, I go back to regular classes tomorrow and a great plus is that tomorrow is my easy day! ^_^ Not much of an eventful day. Love everyone and keep the posts coming!

2004-02-25T18:56:00.000-08:00

2004-02-24T19:50:00.000-08:00

another day has drifted along!

Today was soo hard, we had a huge test that practically the entire student body had to take. It took me from 8:00 to 3:45.. All of it was English very tedious stuff, although English is my best subject.

Anyway that stuff doesn't matter right now! I want to talk about the big J! :-D I am SOO happy, it's freakin crazy what a good nights sleep can do to your attitude. Anyways I really really like him and I can't wait until the next time we hang out! He is GREAT!

I wish he would call me right now, I am really restraining myself by not calling him.... BESIDES it's not fair that I always call him..... Well gotta run!

So extremely happy,
Pyro

P.S.
I
L
O
V
E
E
M
I
L
Y
T
O
O

2004-02-23T19:36:00.000-08:00

I
L
O
V
E
T
I
F
F
A
N
Y
A
N
D
N
I
K
K
I
DO YOU THINK I'LL EVER BE OKAY?

2004-02-22T21:47:00.000-08:00

Hello everyone

Today and the weekend are finally coming to a close. It amazes me that a few chance events could change the course of my life so drastically. But it also amazes me tht I am not much changed... My heart still yearns for it all to end. But do I really know what I want? I... don't know. It just seems like a waste, but what is it wasting? And why would it matter if it is being wasted because that is what is happening anyway.... ARGH! So much CONFUSION! I wish this would all just disappear and me along with it.

Just ticked,
Pyro

P.S. Tomorrow is J.J.'s Birthday

2004-02-22T08:16:00.000-08:00

Alright! Now I am moved and I have a new blog to screw up! :) WHOOO!

Meg

2004-02-20T21:43:00.000-08:00

HI everyone.

I am so confused... Things are almost working out for me. Like my life might actually be worth something, it's really scary and hard for me to believe. Like this really amazing guy... likes... me. So strange. And like my grades could be fixed, so I will have almost all A's instead of 2 bs. My friends and I are going to a state level competition.... I am so confused and worried.

I am certain that the rug will be pulled from under my feet soon enough. I just can't trust the situation.....

I still feel like I'm through. I'm just done with the crap.

Pyro
Love yall

the reason this is "written" on the 20th is because I worte it on the 23rd, and it wouldn't show up with my other one. I didn't want to go a day ahead because then it would just screw me for tomorrow!

Later